Farm Record 005: Dry Goods Store Celebration + Tips for Manifesting Your Way Out of Imposter Syndrome

Launching the Celie & Squeak Dry Goods Store last year really had me deep in my feelings. Who am I kidding? I’m always in my feelings. But the launch has truly had me rethinking how and where I experience … wait for it … imposter syndrome. Now, I’m not even a person who really believes in that term. I do believe that the systemic oppressions that many of us face under a militaristic capitalist regime work to crush our souls and keep us subjugated to a point of paralysis. But I’m not usually one to say, “Oh, hi. I had to work 2-3x as hard as the other folks who entered this particular space, and my being here makes me doubt my skills, talents, and accomplishments. I’m worried you might find out I’m a fraud.”

Now, I don’t say those things—because in the spaces one might normally say those things—school, work, places of steeped white supremacy—I normally excel. But, revealing the work of my heart, that’s a different story.

Me, last year, some time before the launch: I wrote my intentions for the month.

Holley (used to us either going through some family ritual or me asking my tarot deck or going through some #Danielfast and coming back with a revelation): You read some articles, or ...

Said me and every Taurus ever: I just went for it. 😁

Every single thing I’ve ever manifested or “accomplished,” has been the fruit of some initial, barely-there seed: not even a whole idea, but a desire. An urge.

And … you’ve got urges too. The beginnings of businesses or projects or personal growth or familial healing. WHATEVER. Unfortunately, some of you are “I don’t know-ing” and “maybe later-ing” and “it’s whatever-ing” and “insert spacey vibey language alluding to some form of self-growth-omg” yourselves right out of alignment with the pace and progress that God has intended for your life. And as such, robbing all of us of experiencing the beauty that is your full self and work in this world. Hmm. I never even thought of you as selfish before now. 🤷🏾‍♀️ 

I know, because I do the same thing. I’ve had to develop some pretty strong habits - and support systems to get me to stop. So, I thought I’d share at least a couple of those items with you below.
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Here’s a couple tips to help lean in to your desires and manifest all that you want:

🤷🏾‍♀️ THINK AHEAD: It’s hard to figure out what you want in the moment that’s causing you to feel stuck. So ask yourself: Where do I want to be next year? What about 5 years from now? What about when I think about a decade after that?

🤓 TAKE NOTES: Sometimes we want a thing that belongs to a person we’re on our way to becoming. So find someone else who already has that thing (Lord knows you’re on social media enough to let it do you some good). This is a case where comparison is good. Imagine: what kinds of things does this person do? What positive behaviors and characteristics do they possess? How can I align my behaviors and characteristics with what I think I need to get what I want?

✍🏾 WRITE THE VISION: No really. You might be surprised how many notebooks I have filled with ideas. Some of those ideas just iterations of earlier ideas. We need these reference points - especially those of us doing work that requires real self-trust and reflection. Keep writing. Keep doing. You shall see it all. Even if not at once. 💜

I’ll be back with more. I promise.

with <3,
Kholi.